Effective Communication

You Have Permission To Be Yourself

It is not unusual to hear from someone who is clearly not only intelligent and well educated but also a genuinely nice person.Why then does a person like this sometimes have difficulty speaking up and making good conversation?

Why does someone who has abundant talent and ability fail when it comes to making a great impression with others?

I believe the answer is simply this -- thoughtful people hesitate much too much and wait for permission to be themselves.

However....You don´t need to live like this any longer unless you really want to! I suggest that starting today you decide to allow yourself to be as you are and let other people get used to that fact.Be polite and as sociable as you like but do not wait for permission or approval before expressing your opinions. Simply find a suitable moment in the conversation and dive in.

If others do not agree with you then so be it.You are still entitled to not only have an opinion but to express it in your own way. The more you get used to not caring if people like what you say or agree with you the more freedom you will feel.And the more freedom you express the more others will tend to accept both you and your input.

You see, when you apologetically offer an opinion your non-verbal communication sets you up for criticism.Your lack of confidence gives the game away. The secret is to speak up with certainty. Say what you want with conviction - never ask for or wait for permission to be yourself and to express yourself.

And if you can also express yourself without needing approval your confidence will soar. When you remain emotionally detached from the outcome of the conversation, making conversation gets very, very easy.Why is this the case?Because all your self-imposed performance anxiety disappears and you find yourself enjoying the moment.

This is why I like to remind people to drop Conversation Fear -- those anxieties and concerns form the road block on your journey to better relationships, a better social life and greater happiness.

posted by Indira Bandari @ 7:56 PM