Effective Communication

How To Be Confident Even When Others Treat You Harshly

There are times when others will treat you harshly even if you don´t deserve such treatment.And the resulting lack of self-confidence is sometimes made worse by the way you talk to yourself...

It does no good to think negative thoughts about yourself and admonish yourself for "saying the wrong thing" to someone or feel that you've messed up again in your relationship with others.

This type of thinking only further reinforces the fact that you have little or no self-confidence.You are someone special. You are smart. You are interesting and appealing to others.You have a message for the world, and you need to learn to get the message out.

A few suggestions here can help you project the image you want to world to see.

• It's not always about you. Maybe the person you think slighted you has had a bad day, or heaven forbid, maybe the person just isn't nice.You can turn the situation around by asking some general, interesting questions about the person. This may bring the person out of the bad mood and who knows, you might put a little sunshine into someone else's life for a change.
• Quit taking everything so personally. Accept the fact that some people just aren't socially adept, and they may have even less self-confidence than you do.Don't let someone else spoil your day. Don't respond to negative feelings and above all, don't let yourself be provoked. Think positive to keep your emotions in check. Negative thoughts sap your energy and serve no purpose.
• Do you think you're the only one out there who gets rejected? Think again! There are selfish people who only think "me, me, me" to the exclusion of everyone else.Even the most successful people are rejected (singer/songwriter Rod Stewart was rejected several times because his voice was "too gravelly and coarse." He didn't give up and today is rich and famous.)
• Don't give up. The old saying, "if at first you don't succeed, try again" holds true for the person with no self-confidence.If things don't go your way, come up with an alternate plan. If that's not accepted (remember, it not about you; it's about an idea) keep trying.
• Stop focusing on yourself and dwelling on your perceived shortcomings all the time. Focus instead on your goals and what you have to do to achieve them.Stop talking about yourself all the time. Other people get tired of hearing about you constantly. Concentrate on a genuine conversation about other people and other topics.

posted by Indira Bandari @ 8:03 PM